Self-help is one of the most important ways to maintain a sound mind. Oftentimes, practicing self-help can be extremely beneficial in becoming acquainted with yourself. Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, advice on bettering yourself for the professional world, or information on how to focus on your goals, self-help books provide a plethora of insight involving how to face many problems.
However, it is important to note that self-help books may not be for everyone. While they positively impact many people who read them, they may not always cover what you are looking for. This could be because you chose the wrong type of book or simply because reading this type of information may not be best suited for you. Self-help books may or may not actually help you, depending on your situation.
Understand that the purpose of this article is to inform, not to persuade. I won’t be taking sides trying to convince you one way or another. Instead, I will do my best to provide an objective bit of information. Whether or not you choose to partake in reading self-help books is completely your decision. I just want to educate you on both sides of the debate.
What is Wrong with Self-Help Books?
Self-help books may not be that great for everyone. Sure, they can be very in-depth, very informative, and very detailed, but reading words on a page does not always get the job done. Many people cherish the opportunity to discuss important matters with family, friends, or even a clinical specialist.
Some people complain that there are several flaws with self-help books. Recurring problems deal with the lack of another human being. Being able to have a conversation with another understanding person can be much more intimate than reading a book, whether it comes from professional therapy or a regular conversation with a friend.
Out of the many sources of therapy, informative advice, or encouraging reassurance, self-help books may not be a concrete enough way to convince someone who is struggling to improve himself or herself. While they can be filled with an enormous amount of information, they may not exactly hit the nail right on the head.
Cons of Self-Help Books
Not Personal Enough
The reason you hear so much about therapy is because it has been proven to work. However, in order for therapy to work, you must develop an in-depth connection with all parties involved. You are much more likely to connect with another person rather than a book.
Different people react differently to various types of therapy, but it is probably fair to say that human connection plays a major role in life. Any Google search related to the importance of human interaction can tell you that.
With that being said, reading a book is rarely anything like conversing with another person. Books can have a bunch of information, but like text messages, you do not reap the benefits of the emotion transferred during a face-to-face encounter. A lack of complete clarity may not yield the most successful results.
Bottom line: books are not people. The likelihood of you gaining useful knowledge from a book is much less than the assurance that a conversation with another person will at least give you an idea of a more realistic situation.
Suppose you are wondering what the meaning of life is (obviously a bit too vague of a question than may be suitable, but this is just an example). You are fortunate enough to meet a 100-year-old man. A conversation strikes up, and you learn everything you could have imagined about how to live a successful life. Well, that seems a bit more useful and practical than reading a book written by a middle-aged man who claims to have life figured out.
Advice or Information Is Too Broad
Many self-help books are directed toward a wide audience in order to appeal to a greater domain. The goal of a self-help book often aims at educating about varying bits of information, techniques, and ideas rather than focusing on one specific problem.
You might indulge in a book whose title claims to have everything you need to know about living a healthy life. In your mind, you are expecting tips on how to eat properly, how often to exercise, and other ways to improve your physical life. What you are not looking for is a lecture on how to transform negative energy into positive energy within your being, which will result in a positive glow emanating from your inner self. Unfortunately, this may be intertwined within the pages.
Self-help books are not always beneficial because they may not do a good enough job of staying on topic or proving relatable specifically to you. Sometimes, though possible, it can be rather difficult to find exactly what you are looking for.
You Don’t Have Time to Read a Book
With the busyness of every-day life, finding the time to sit down and read through something can seem nearly impossible. There are much better ways to gain knowledge: human interaction, which will find itself talked about many times in this article, listening to a podcast, watching a video, etc.
Another factor to consider is the energy required to get through a book. If you are lucky enough to actually find the time, the attention needed to understand every little thing you are reading can seem overwhelming compared to the lessons that you may or may not get out of it.
Lastly, one reason pertaining to the time and energy needed to read a self-help book is the fact that as humans, we thrive off of instant gratification. Whether you want to believe it or not, we are oftentimes much more impatient than we may believe. What is the point in reading a couple hundred pages of a book when we want the answers now? Self-help books do not provide the information we seek in a timely manner.
‘Self-Help’ Is Not a Legitimate Way to Grow
Some people believe the ideas of self-help and self-help books are just another way for people to make money. If you want to get better at something, how can you, the inexperienced one, teach yourself? Just because you might read a book about it does not mean you are automatically capable of achieving whatever it is you are looking for.
Usually, success follows experience. It is not logically possible to become successful in a particular field without first gaining prior knowledge about the subject, and reading a self-help book is not the ideal way to gain that knowledge. As stated before, it may turn out to be a huge waste of time where you expend more energy than you get in return.
I Don’t Even Understand What Is Wrong, So How Will a Book Know?
If you are looking for advice from resources other than yourself, it is safe to say there is something you do not have figured out. If this is the case, how can you trust a book written by someone who doesn’t know you and your particular situation help you?
Only you know what is going on inside your head. All your questions, all your fears, all your concerns can only be understood at their deepest level by you alone, so what is the point in even giving a self-help book the chance?
Since they are meant for an audience, they will not focus on you. You will not be able to mend the broken or confusing pieces of your life with the help of a few measly chapters on “how to be happy.” That term alone is such a broad statement in general. If you cannot even understand yourself, how can a book do any better?
The reason other ways to grow are more compatible – talking with another person, for example – with your situation is the way in which personal connection with someone else is more reliable than words on a page. Talking to someone with experience provides you with the opportunity to see your own situation better because you can vicariously live through someone else’s past to understand any relations, and therefore, any further similarities.
Self-help Books Make Me Even More Confused
Adding on to the possibility that a self-help book is much too vague to reach specific people, they may make you more flustered than you were before opening them. If you are looking for something specific to guide you to some sort of enlightenment, you may be disappointed to find that the book you are reading is not only intended for you, but for many people.
If you find yourself in this situation, it can be easy to stray from the path you are trying to pursue. A bunch of different sections branching off from the main idea of the self-help book you are reading can make you start to question even more circumstances.
In the end, you will wind up searching more fervently for an answer than you were before you opened the book.
People Who Write Self-help Books Are Not Qualified
Just as any other author, if you write something good enough, it can get published. You do not have to earn a Ph.D. in crime to write mystery novels; you just have to have an imagination.
Similarly, if someone wants to write about “The Top Ten Ways to Control Your Temper,” he does not have to be a certified specialist in anger management to write two hundred pages about trying to stay calm.
Just because someone may write about similar feelings, goals, or actions you would like to see yourself accomplish does not mean he or she has endured the same path as you. Maybe he or she had it much easier; maybe his or her path was substantially more difficult than yours. Every person is different, and people get through things in different ways.
Quick Review of Self-Help Book Cons
- Self-help books are definitely not for everyone.
- If you are looking for a more personal way to deal with any questions you may have, talking about it with someone is probably a better bet than reading a book.
- Just because they are popular does not mean they will work for you.
- Books are not the most interactive way to grow.
- Find what works best for you, not what you hear works best for others.
What Makes a Good Self-Help Book?
Self-help books are praised for the impact they can have on many readers. These books can be good for just about any struggle someone may face; topics dealing with self-help range vastly. But what makes self-help books so effective for so many people? How do you know if you are getting your money’s worth?
This first bit of advice might seem obvious, but if you choose to look into a self-help book, make sure you choose the right topic. For example, if you want to gain insight on how to make more money and rise in the professional ranks, do not go out and buy a book on mental health. While mental health is extremely important – even in matters concerning financial stability – a book focused solely on mental health will not provide you with the specifics you are looking for.
Do some research and find a book specifically tailored to your curiosity. Chances are that there is at least some level of helpful information out there for your particular problem.
Next, one sign that shows a self-help book is doing its job is if you actively notice yourself improving in whatever field you are attempting to better yourself in. Let’s say that you are struggling in a relationship. As a result, you find a self-help book about building and maintaining relationships. If after you read this book you notice that your interactions with people around you have improved, you will most likely credit much of your improvement to that self-help book you so eagerly dug through.
Finding the right type of self-help book and pushing yourself to practice techniques found in the book can help you decide whether or not the book you chose is good.
Pros of Self-Help Books
Provide Insight That I Had Not Thought of Before
Self-help books can teach you things you may have been unaware of. Yes, it can also be helpful to actually talk to someone, but books can be very interactive; they can make you think, make you feel, make you want to change. Words have much more of an impact on people than we may think.
While some people think self-help books contain too broad of a range of information, sometimes that might be a good thing. If you are having trouble comprehending your struggles, a book can be filled with differing – even opposing – reasons for the same problem. This will help you figure out the root of your problem, pushing you to start from the most basic step as you begin your improvement.
Reading a book written by someone else – perhaps someone on the entire opposite side of the world – is such a neat opportunity. You will find that you can relate to people in totally different cultures, beliefs, and situations than you. If anything, reading self-help books can open up your mind to the idea that you are not the only person struggling with something every day.
These Books Teach Different Methods of Improvement
With varying experiences in different walks of life, you will find that self-help books written about the same thing but by different authors will provide an interesting combination of suggested techniques that may prove useful for you.
Learning about different ways to cope, improve, learn, or whatever you are searching for can be a great way to test what works best for you.
Let’s say you would like to learn how to accomplish more work at a more efficient pace at your job. You pick up a couple of books that talk about work efficiency. One book suggests that you make an organized, daily list, follow that list with specific goals to reach throughout the day, and be satisfied with your work.
Another book recommends setting weekly goals instead of staying too organized. It says that doing this will push you to finish what you need to have done by Friday without having the burden of rushing through your work to reach daily goals.
You will be able to try both of these methods and decide what works best for you, thus resulting in a more productive work environment for you.
Opportunity to Hear the Point of View of Someone I Can Relate to
As mentioned above, reading self-help books can give advice on your struggles from the point of view of someone else, even in a totally different part of the world. While it is true that you are not generally talking to someone else when you read, you still have the ability to read the thoughts of another. Reading someone’s writing allows you to dive into the mind of another person, making your experiences and troubles all the more relatable.
Sometimes, all you need is the reassurance that you are not alone. Gathering information from someone who has gone through a similar situation as you can be enough to convince you to get better.
It does not matter if you do not personally know the author of the self-help book you are reading. If you feel like you have developed some sort of connection with the words in the book, it is likely having some sort of impact on you.
Lessons Apply to Many Different Situations
While some people complain that self-help books are not specific enough, others appreciate the fact that information in the books is applicable to many facets of life. A self-help book on resisting temptations can be put into action by a number of people; those struggling with drug addiction, self-confidence issues, laziness, lack of motivation, and many other things that revolve around taking positive action.
Another interesting thing about self-help books is that they may help you out with something you were not aware you needed guidance with. You might come across a book in the library about remaining in the present. You decide to read a couple of pages and realize that perhaps your recent bouts of anxiety are a result of worrying too much about the future. As a result, you read on and learn how to cope with nervousness and how to appreciate the present.
Self-help books can teach you things that you were previously unaware of or that prior to thinking about them more, you had not considered them to be of significant importance.
More Affordable Than Therapy
This is not to suggest that every instance involving self-help requires therapy, but since we discussed therapy over books in the cons section, we thought we would give a bit more insight on the subject.
If you are struggling with depression, addiction, or the like, self-help books can be extremely beneficial because they involve quick results at a minimal price. Rather than worrying about being able to afford a therapist for serious situations like these, self-help books can clearly and simply paint a picture of things you are doing wrong, things you need to work on, and reasons you are feeling or acting a certain way.
Additionally, maybe you are not comfortable talking with someone else about your problems or aspirations. Reading a book that outlines your curiosity can be much more effective than awkwardly trying to talk with a stranger.
Self-improvement Is a Good Use of Time
Perhaps you find yourself with a lot of extra time on your hands. Well, if there is something you have been wanting to improve upon, you have little reason to not take the time to read through a self-help book.
Educating yourself and learning new things are better uses of time than sitting back in fear of facing your problems. Reading self-help books can be the first step in gaining the confidence you need to begin something new.
Sometimes, all you need is that first leap of faith to take action and become better in any part of your life. Be confident that committing to something like self-help will result in positivity. If you commit to reading a self-help book, you may find yourself unable to put it down.
Self-help Information Has Lasting Effects
Do you remember that one book you read in high school that you actually enjoyed? Of all the books assigned to you, it is the only work that has remained ingrained in your mind through all these years.
As is common for many books, self-help books can stick with you for a long time. If you are determined to come out of your struggles successfully, delving into every little detail of a self-help book can help you mold your point of view to fit daily, weekly, or any type of recurring thoughts or actions to take for improvement.
Remembering things you learned from reading self-help books may also help you with other things in life. Just because you read a book and perfected the art of etiquette does not mean that is the only thing the book taught you. Perhaps now you will have a better idea of organization, manners, and cleanliness in other aspects of life. Yes, this is an odd example, but after all, there are numerous ways to improve yourself.
Quick Review of Self-Help Book Pros
- Self-help books have the ability to reach a wide range of audiences.
- It does not get much easier than sitting down and reading a few pages to improve your life.
- Reading self-help books allows you to see worldly yet relatable problems from the perspective of others.
- Information you read in self-help books can stick with you forever.
- It is too affordable and easy to not at least give it a shot.
Self-Help Books May Be Worth It
Whether or not you choose the method of trying to improve different parts of your life by reading self-help books falls onto one person’s shoulders: your own. In the end, it all depends on personal preference. If reading really is not your thing, and you do not see much benefit from practicing self-help, then maybe you should steer clear of these types of books.
On the other hand, if you love reading or you are simply ready to try something new, pick up a self-help book and discover if it will impact you as much as it so often does others. There is nothing wrong with at least giving it a chance.
Self-help is regarded as a very important part of life by many people. It is essential that if you are struggling with anything, you have the confidence to address your problem and attempt to fix it. Do not be afraid to face struggles. After all, everyone goes through something at one time or another.
