A handshake is a very common form of greeting in the business world and personal life.

This is one of those things that one gesture speaks a thousand words about you. So you wanna make sure you do it properly.

First things first.

There are ONLY FIRM handshakes exist in this or any other world.
Let’s just get this out of the way. It’s Important.

With all the different styles and kinds of handshakes, there is one unbreakable and unspoken rule.

Either do it the right way or don’t do it at all.

When you meet people for the very first time, the first impression matters a lot.
In your daily life and especially in business.

Have you ever done or witnessed something like, ”Oh, I should probably go for a handshake right about now”… then awkwardly you try to barely pull your hand over towards the other person’s hand, and you do that “low-confidence hanging spaghetti handshake”. Yeah, that.

Not only it seems like there is something inherently wrong with you and your hand but also what the hell happened to your energy and your confidence?

What are you dying on me right now?

And you’re trying to get a job in their company saying you can do great and “unimaginable” things.

Or you’re trying to reassure them that their money will be safe with you, or you trying to help them sell the house?

See where the problem is? What you say doesn’t match with your behavior. No congruency. That breaks trust.

Your credibility from this first impression is’t that great because your handshake is saying something “subtle” about you— you can’t probably tie your shoelaces without getting some help.

Have you noticed, any deals companies make, they close it with a firm  2-3 second handshake…
They even take pictures of it.

And what are you doing?

Are you trying to imitate Ross Gellar from TV series “Friends”, when he was saying his famous ”Hiiiiii” in that depressed voice like he had few more seconds to live and that was about all the energy he could manage before dropping dead? Right on:)

Don’t do “the dead fish handshake.”

Another thing that blows my mind, is when you do that weak spaghetti handshake you pull your hand forward with palm down.

It looks like you are trying to make that other person kiss your hand or something.

Painfully awkward. It seems as though you yourself have no clue what were you trying to go for there. What’s wrong with you?

For the love of God, please stop. Stop doing that.

It’s not only that you make yourself look terrible.

You greatly embarrass your friend or whoever it is on the receiving end and create that cringey uncomfortable situation which he or she is already trying HARD to permanently ERASE from their memory.

Too late for that one, huh. The damage can’t be undone. 🙂

It has to be firm enough to show respect.

This is the key. Squeeze firmly, ideally just as much as the other person does.
If you don’t get it right, you make a poor first impression. This is basic psychology. It matters a lot.

I also know quite a few ladies who use a handshake to see if that other person is even worth considering for dating.

It’s a big deal. Master it.

The only people it doesn’t matter to, are the oblivious people who do those dead fish-like handshakes.

Don’t try to afflict pain to assert your dominance on another person.

Harness the power and energy within if you must and do a firm handshake for one to three seconds.

Handshakes longer than three seconds can only be done to your best buddies. Nobody else.

Two seconds is a sweet spot. Don’t creep out people.

Don’t ever do a handshake seated.

This is super important in a job interview especially. Let’s say you come in 15 minutes before your time. They offer you to have a seat and wait. The interviewer will be with you shortly.

Sometime after, a person comes to you saying hello, and extending his arm indicating he or she wants to shake your hand.

You must fully stand up,  and only then go for a handshake.
Do not do a handshake while you are still rising from the seat.

A handshake is a gesture that shows respect.

A seated handshake does the opposite. It shows massive disrespect.
It sub-communicates to the other person that they are not important to you.

Isn’t that an oopsie, when you are being interviewed for the job you want at their company.
Sorry to tell you this, but you are not getting it.

You know what else it tells people when you don’t stand up when shaking hands?

The absence of manners.

Is that important? Hmm…
Well, think about it for a second.

Who is gonna hire you to REPRESENT their company if they see you have no manners?
What’s that gonna say about THEM?

Manners help people determine whether or not you’re gonna be a good fit for the team vibe, and will treat customers, your boss, and your colleagues with respect and dignity they deserve.

Make sure your hands are out of the pockets.

These are simple common manners. They are not a common practice at all.
Just like the previous point. It’s all about respect.

Shaking somebody’s hand while having another hand in the pocket is a sign of arrogance. It clearly says that you are not willing to spare an incredibly small amount of energy it takes to take your other hand out of the pocket when you shake somebody’s hand.

Disrespect.

Don’t neglect this point.

If you are not willing to spend such a small amount of energy on such a little thing, you aren’t gonna be spending anything when it comes to something meaningful.

You are just not trustworthy at all.

And I understand there are people that are EXCEPTIONS.  People, who keep their hands in the pockets because they are simply cold. And there is no agenda behind.

And yet again, look. Are you that cold, that you cannot spare 2 seconds, to show simple respect to another person?

Show respect, take hands out, shake hands, then you can put them back in.

Let me show further.
If you are cold, chances are that the other person can be cold too. And yet they do the right thing anyway, and you don’t.

Great…
Which takes us to the next point.

Don’t shake hands while wearing gloves.

Be that motorcycle gloves, climbing gloves, or a pair of your winter gloves.

If someone is going for a handshake, remove the gloves, and then shake their hand.

Simple respect. Again.

Sometimes it’s okay if it’s a cold winter and both people shake hands wearing gloves.

They will be willing to wait for you to remove gloves before you go for a handshake.

Just do this, and you will notice how the other person will instantly appreciate you doing this, and might get very cranky and give you that look if you didn’t. Rightfully so.

Again, take a few seconds of your time to remove the gloves and show respect to the other person.

And be proactive about it, don’t have to make them wait. If you see they are coming your way, take off the gloves.

Also if you’re holding anything in your right hand, put it in the left one for a moment.

Conclusion:

These little and subtle things are not so little after all. These little things make up the whole picture.
They play an important role in your everyday’s life.

The little things can be the difference between you getting your dream job or not.

If you still don’t know how to do a handshake properly, or you always get that awkwardness, go practice on your friends and loved ones.

In business thou, use the golden rule: “If you don’t know how to do it right and if the other person doesn’t go for it, don’t initiate it.”

Handshakes play a major role in making a good first impression.

Do you wanna look like a no-energy creepy individual who you cannot rely on?
I bet the answer is no.

Practice on cadavers, if you must. Practice often. Make sure you get this right.

That alone will help to change the way people perceive you.
There is a reason why YouTube has so many “awkward handshakes compilations”. You don’t wanna end up in one of those videos.